We met with a specialist this week about our troubles getting pregnant. We left with an armful of information of fertility treatments and adoption. Oddly it was both devastating and comforting to hear her say, “yes, there is a problem”. I am not sure why it felt good to hear it, other than it just affirmed our suspicions and made me feel like I’m not crazy. And, she gave us hope. Which I felt I had lost.
We do not yet know exactly what the problem is but there are two things that she zeroed in on more than once. My age. I’ll be a young 36 on Monday and this concerns her. She is worried about premature menopause as it runs in my family and I have been having night-sweats. Secondly, the fact that I have never been on any form of contraception in our 16-year marriage is troublesome. So, we are both being tested right now-some things are pending already and more tests are scheduled for this week.
We are struggling with how aggressive to be with this. We don’t want to play God but have such a strong desire to have a child. Adam, especially does not want to do anything really invasive. I had told him about Clomid before our appointment and after she explained it even better he is comfortable with trying it. As we talked about the increased risk of multiple babies, though Adam quickly said, “we aren’t greedy…we just want one!”. If anything, we are at highest risk for twins…it was odd to listen to her talk about twins as she talked like twins are no big deal! Which, in hindsight, I am sure she delivers multiples all the time but geesh….more than one!?! The idea gives us the jitters to be sure, especially considering my Father-in-law’s dream about our twin boys when we were first married! Yikes!! No matter what we will be thankful to Him for however many he gives us!
I will be starting the Clomid in a couple of weeks. Meanwhile we are praying that we get pregnant naturally this month! And, we are trying to keep our spirits up. They gave us a bunch of information on the psychological aspect of infertility….all TRUE. Just sayin’.
The best of luck to yall and I laughed out loud at “we aren’t greedy…we just want one!”
Oh man! This is so hard, and so exciting. I know those feeling very well. I know everyone is different, every body has a different need. For me, the Chlomid worked. I really really really really really hope it works for you guys. I really hope that so desperately. I want you guys to have a baby more than anyone on the planet. I really do. I know that your family is going to come together though. I don’t know HOW or WHEN, but I know that it will.
I love you guys.
You guys would be such great parents. Hoping and praying your arms are filled. ♥♥♥
Twins are awesome! From my far-off facebook observations, I think you’ve got what it takes. Best wishes…
Good luck, Adam and Shana! And if you have twins, two for the price of one (as one of my friends who is also an older mother with twins puts it : ) You’ll be in my prayers.
If they’re half as cute as yours we’ll take ’em!! 😉