It is awful that money plays a role in so many decisions in our lives. Money can be the root of a lot of good….and a lot of bad. Infertility is expensive. I have had people tell me “well, you know…kids are expensive”. This, we realize. But if you have not struggled with infertility, you didn’t struggle with these type of expenses before you had your child. (note: we have not endured the bottom three…..yet).
- A D&C after a miscarriage is about $6k….we’ve had two in the past year (partially paid for by insurance)
- Chromosomal testing of your baby that you lost: $2300-we’ve done this twice. (not paid by insurance)
- Chromosomal testing of parents: about $2k (not paid by insurance)
- Genetic counseling: $500 (paid 50% by insurance)
- Fertility specialist consultation: $75-$150 each visit (not paid by insurance). And yes, phone calls cost-but thank God phone calls are an option!
- Pelvic MRI: $2k (paid partially by insurance)
- Fertility testing (HSGs, ultrasounds, blood work, hystersonograms, etc): in the thousands and NOT paid by insurance.
- IUI: $500 (not paid by insurance)
- Laparoscopic myomectomy with morcellation/endometriosis removal: $75k (praise the LORD for insurance-mostly paid for!!!!)
- Fertility medications: $500 (not paid by insurance)
- Missed wages for time off for both Mother and Father: A LOT.
- Travel for above testing, appointments, surgeries (gas, hotels, food): A LOT.
- IVF: $31k and $7k more for each additional attempt (this is going to a reputable facility that will do testing of your embryos before implantation). If for some reason they cannot use my eggs, this goes up to $44k initially instead of the $31k (not paid by insurance).
- Surrogacy: $100-150k
- Adoption: $36-52k (it can be done cheaper but the wait will likely be longer. These amounts are from the two agencies that if we were to proceed with adoption, we would likely utilize).
Amazing, isn’t it. These are costs before you bring your baby home….then there are the diapers, baby furniture, clothes, college, weddings!!! =) Would we do anything different? Absolutely not. Would we do it all again? Absolutely. Do we regret the money we have had to come up with? No, no, and no. Otherwise, we would be living with an even bigger “what if” in our lives. “What if we had tried _____”….”what if we saw Doctor _____”….”what if we had gone to a different city”. So far we will never say “what if”-because we did.
The question for us currently is “what now?”. As you can see the cost of adoption and surrogacy is absolutely nothing to take lightly and no matter what route we go will dramatically affect us financially. No matter how we try to look at it. Any of the bottom three things listed are overwhelming financially and we aren’t even sure if they are doable. Of course, just like with anything, there is a loan for EVERYthing, including babies! Is this how we want to start our family, though? In an amount of debt that is life-changing and will certainly affect the lifestyle you provide for your child?
But, ultimately our (future) family is worth it.
Please continue to pray for us to know what direction He wants us to go in and for insight on how to possibly finance upcoming steps we may take.
Let me leave you with one last thought:
Having a baby in our arms: PRICELESS
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