Pretending to be a fabulous somebody

I need to first preface this post by saying I don’t think that I am a nobody, nor do I feel sorry for myself, yada yada. This post is meant to be humorous and you’ll see what I mean shortly.

The fact of the matter however, is that I do indeed need to pretend to be somebody pretty fancy on April 28th. I can’t just be plain ol’ NP Shana Carter. She isn’t gonna cut it, folks. She needs a makeover of sorts I suppose.

I received a call from the hospital last week asking if I would be interested in speaking at the annual Women’s Spring Luncheon on the 28th. Not thinking much of it, I said sure~no problem before she even said “if you want to think about it, you can”. Meanwhile I am thinking….I give a pretty mean talk on urinary incontinence that involves a balloon and a straw-can’t go wrong with that! Could always pull that one off! Heh heh….

The conversation progressed something like this (I am going to refer to the person on the other end as “nice lady” because she IS and you’ll see why in the end). 

Me: Okay, so just so I have an idea about how many people will there be? (all the while I was thinking in my teeny minded brain that it would be somewhere in the hospital and therefore a small crowd)

Nice lady: Well, it is at the Elks Club (my eyes dilated right at this moment as this is where only large events are held) because there is usually between 150-200 women in attendance.

Me: Oooohhh, okay. silence. Well, can you maybe tell me some of the other topics in the past that speakers have done to give me some ideas?

Nice lady: One year Miss Nebraska talked about heart disease. The Governors wife did an inspirational talk. Another year Miss Nebraska was here again and her platform was on 4-H. Oh, Coach Cook (the Nebraska head Volleyball coach) gave an inspirational talk one year, and another year LeAnn Thieman spoke (you know the one that rescued all of the orphan babies from Vietnam in boxes in the back of a US military cargo plane)

Me: Ummmm, well. silence. Okay, well I’ll see what I can come up with. (oh plus I think I may have pee’d myself a little)

My nurse walked into my office a few minutes later and I asked her if she had ever heard about this luncheon thing and she said “you didn’t?!” as her jaw hit the floor. “What were you thinking?!” Well, I obviously wasn’t as I said yes before gathering all of the facts. But in all fairness to nice lady she did say I could think about it.

Let the freaking out commence here.

At first I’m thinking no one is going to want to come to see ME. They are going to see this thing advertised and be so disappointed so I need a hot topic! What about sex?! That was my first idea but one of my partners said…”what are you thinking, do you want 500 people showing up?! Maybe you should stick with something safer!”

What to do, what to do? I’ve never been in a pageant! The fanciest dress I’ve ever worn was my wedding dress. I never played college athletics~too busy studying! Politics? No way but I do vote and I have already registered here in our new county. Oh, and I have been to Washington, D.C…….in high school (does that count for anything?). I certainly have never rescued any cute little babies!

I continued asking all of the nurses at the clinic what I should talk about and they were literally all shell-shocked that I took this on and just said “why can’t we just help you with what to wear and how to do your hair?”. Seriously? Seriously? I’m dying here!

Adam was away for work so I tell him all about it this past weekend. He just kind of shook his head in disbelief as well and then last night I remembered about LeAnn Thieman (the Vietnam lady). I had forgotten to tell him about her. He looked at me and said, “babe….I think you should go in and talk to them (basically he was referring to nice lady) and make sure they really meant they want you to do this”.

So, I did. I stopped “nice lady” in the hall this morning after rounding at the hospital and told her of my concerns and do you know what she said? She said that she views it as exact opposite. She said that I am their Miss Nebraska. I am here putting down roots, growing in this new community. What a better way to show the public that~to show them myself. And by the time I made it to the office even my nurse’s mindset had changed from last week. She walked in and said, “you know, I’ve been thinking more about this luncheon and I think this could be really good for you. People that don’t know you are now going to know you. And, I want to sit in the front row”.

I’ll tell you more later about what it will be about. No, not about sex. The red hats will be there so I nixed the sex idea. Drats.

Christmas parrrrtttyy!!!

My nurses. Janna (on the left) is my nurse every day but Tuesday and Renee is my "Tuesday nurse" as I call her. Quite literally THE best nurses!

Last night was the annual Cozad Community Health System’s Employee Christmas party. A great time was had. The prime rib was great and once again nice to get together with one another’s spouses. Adam donated the use of his photo booth for the event and it was a hit. It is such a hoot to stand outside that booth and watch the screen to see whomever is in the booth posing for their pictures especially when you work so closely with these people day in and day out. So. Much. Fun.

 

once again, the bestest nurses (despite the appearance of hanging!!)

My very own St. Louis Arch

My photo for the new clinic was taken by an older gentleman and his wife. They are the same couple that took the photos at the Fall Ball and have been doing photography in the area for years. When I arrived he asked me if there was anything about me he needed to know. I wasn’t for sure where he was heading with his question….the first thing that came to mind was my eyebrows. Not kidding. I told him that my sister and brothers and I tend to have an issue with our eyebrows shooting up in photos. He said, okay then and went to take the first photo and said very fast and with great wit, “oh my, yes….we do have a St. Louis Arch there, don’t we?!”. I am dead serious. He truly said that. And I laughed and laughed. At least I have a St. Louis Arch. My younger brother can look mean when his eyebrows act up, my older can look constipated, this is how mine can look….just plain ol’ uneven (and I do believe this fine gentleman did a lil’ work on my right St. Louis Arch before he printed this too):  oooooohh, and kudos to my CEO and the hospital for the gorgeous ad!!!

Fall Ball

Saturday night was the hospital foundation’s 2010 Fall Ball. They host this annually to induct person’s into their hall of fame. There is a speaker, wonderful dinner, silent auction, live music and dancing~you name it. We were told of it weeks ago and warned in advance that it was formal but not quite sure how much. Adam wore a suit and I a dress with 2″ heels. A car pulled in next to us and a woman got out with feathers in her hair and we immediately knew that we certainly were not OVER-dressed!

I had ordered my shoes online and had them sent to my sister’s address earlier last week and my 18 and 21 year old nieces saw me pick them up Friday night and asked if this was “uh, like a prom for adults?”. Turned out to pretty much be. And let me tell you….it was awesome.

There were truffles with a cute lil’ go box by our name cards at our table. The room was draped in chiffon from the ceiling to the floor. Live music all night. Prime rib was served and the speaker was LeAnn Thieman~AMAZING!

LeAnn Thieman is a nurse but is also a well-known writer and speaker. She wrote Chicken Soup for the Nurse’s Soul, in addition to many other of the Chicken Soup books. Most interesting, however is that she was one of just a few people that were a part of Operation Baby Lift in 1975 where she helped take 100 babies out of Vietnam to the U.S. She had photos where they literally took babies 2-4 per cardboard box in a cargo plane. Very inspiring.

There was a photographer there that took formals of each couple and I am told we will be receiving this in the mail. It was wonderful to meet my partner’s spouses and the other 270 people there!! As we dress up NEVER, Adam had his camera out OF COURSE and caught me coming down the stairs. Remember when I fell and broke my arm last March. Yeah, well that was the last time I wore heels. This was almost a fall but I caught myself:

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

And, one final photo of us (isn’t Adam a hottie!)…the night just confirmed even more that we realllly want to take dance lessons. Too bad we have never lived close enough to a bigger community that offers them.